If Only

I stop
For only just
One moment,
Never taking
Longer than my
Yearning for you allows.
You, whom I
Only trust
Under certain
Circumstances.
Only when
Unrealistic expecations
Lord over me the
Dreams of
Knights in shining armor.
Nightmares of monsters
Of dragons and
Witches
Warlocks
Hags,
All curse me
To live
In this
Waiting for you.
All stare while
Sinister thoughts
Raid my
Ever-dwindling hope.
All make the
Longing
Linger.
You don't see
The pain.
How it crushes
Inward and will
Never let me stand.
Kneeling, I grasp and
I struggle for
Nothing. And my
Grave is dug deeper.